It’s Thanksgiving, a time when a man’s thoughts turn to Turkeys and losers. Normally I’d mean the holiday meal and the Detroit Lions, but in this case I’m talking our elected officials. Turkeys and losers, you can quote me on that.

As I sit around the table for what will surely be a heated debate with family and close friends, I will be reminded of the millions of Americans who are just a touch less thankful because they lost their jobs this year. As I pass the food around the holiday table, I’ll be reminded of the people in Congress who pass out blame and never take responsibility for their actions, and as I watch the Lions I will be reminded that the American voter is on track to lose again. We voted for hope and change, we got more debt and bigger government. Not exactly what we voted for, at least not exactly what I voted for.

There is a tradition in some families that they go around the table and say something that they’re thankful for. If you indulge me, I’ve got a list of things I’m not thankful for.

            I’m not thankful that we were told the Stimulus would cap unemployment at around 8% and it’s over 10%.

            I’m not thankful that every time there’s a problem with anything, we’re told that all the problems are the responsibility of the last administration because Obama is only in office for 10 months, yet 9/11 was Bush’s fault when he was only in office 8 months at that point.

            I’m not thankful that we’re homogenizing and sanitizing everything. Swine flu is now H1N1, Bonuses are now Performance insensitive. Let’s just change crappy job to Status Quo.

            I’m not thankful that an official government website lists jobs created and saved in districts that don’t exist.

            I’m not thankful that Obama said during his campaign that Americans must work together and that the parties have to stop bashing one another, and then does everything in the White House’s power to turn the word Republican into the trendiest abomination there is.

            I’m not thankful that legitimate political protest can be written off as the ramblings of a handful of racist rednecks.

            I’m not thankful that the President feels the need to wait on a decision to commit troops when boots on the ground are already in harms way and need support, yet feels the need to rush the Stimulus and Health Care Legislation through.

            I’m not thankful that the Press Secretary feels the need to talk down to, in both tone and tactic, any group of Americans who fail to be in lock step with the administration.

            I’m not thankful that Obama says he wants transparency and is pro-gay rights, yet hides behind the same Patriot Act shield when it’s convenient for him, and hasn’t done squat to overturn Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. (By the way, I do believe that can be overturned by Executive Order…)

            And I am absolutely not grateful that the current Congress and White House has the hubris to determine that America needs health care whether we want it or not, and that NYC needs the 9/11 trials. Those 2 mistakes reek of arrogance of historical magnitude.

            Yep, we like the Lions, lose again. But some years, the Lions win. Here’s how we do it.

            We need strong campaign finance reform and term limits. Democrats complain that Insurance Companies are in the GOP’s pocket, and the GOP counters that Unions are running the Democrats. Here’s how to fix it. In order to contribute to a campaing you need 2 things, a pulse and a Social Security number. Yep, you have to be a living, breathing person in order to contribute. No corporate, PAC, lobby or union contributions. You must be American, living, and do it out of your own funds.

A bonus of this is it will bring the cost of elections down.

 No loop holes either, the RNC & DNC can only take money from people as well. And while we’re at it, hows about this, the donor has to be from your district. If you run for Governor, you can only take money from the people in your state, running for Congress, you can only take money from people in your district. Why? So out of area interests can’t buy your representation.

And please, get some term limits in place. Do we really need another person clogging up the vote? Fresh blood, fresh ideas. I want politicians who are trying to make a change, not ones who just wanna keep their jobs.

I know, it’s unlikely that I’ll live to see this kind of change, but hey, it’s Thanksgiving.

Go Lions.

**Jim Mendrinos is a New York City based comedian, author and pundit. He is a frequent guest on FoxNews.com’s Strategy Room and the host of “To Review” right here on Team Washington. Visit him at http://www.republicancomic.com/, www.twitter.com/jimmendrinos, or write him at GOPlaughs@gmail.com for his schedule and show information.

Although most historians trace the tradition to President Harry S. Truman in 1947 -- due to a photo showing Truman with a turkey -- some controversy still exists over this origin. Archivists say that in the photo, Truman is actually only receiving a turkey, kicking off an annual tradition of presidents receiving turkeys from the National Turkey Federation.

Another slew of commander-in-chiefs including Eisenhower, Ford, Nixon and Carter may or may not have ever pardoned one of the big birds -- although they all posed for a photo-op.

JFK did spare a turkey on Nov. 19, 1963, however Kennedy archivist Steve Plotkin says that it "was probably offhand, purely spontaneous." The bird was given to Kennedy wearing a sign saying, "Good Eatin' Mr. President." In response, Kennedy said, "let's just keep him."

Begin drumroll here, because the first official pardoned bird took the stage in 1989 during the first White House Thanksgiving of George H.W. Bush.

"He will not end up on anyone's dinner table -- not this guy," Bush said. "He's granted a presidential pardon as of right now."

The rest is, well, turkey history! Sorry, tom...

What did turkeys ever do to be compared with human beings who behave badly?

Being a city boy, I haven't met many turkeys over the years, but the ones I've encountered are pleasant birds who have a remarkably sunny disposition considering the fact that many of them won't live past Thanksgiving. It's funny to hear the sounds they make and to watch them spread their wings. I can't say the same about those people who are called turkeys. They're not fun to watch or listen to, and generally don't have pleasant dispositions even though they're very likely to be alive after November 26.

So I'm not going to call the politicians who I think behaved badly this year turkeys, because they don't deserve to be in the same company as our fine feathered friends.

Because turkeys would never put politics and their personal self-interest above the greater good, the way almost all Republicans did this year in the healthcare debate.

I know it's hard to tell, but I even think turkeys have the sense of humor sorely lacking in many of our leaders. While President Obama has a wonderful sense of humor and is spontaneously funny, I can't say the same for our Congressional leaders.

John Boehner is humorless, Mitch McConnell has never come close to cracking a smile, and Harry Reid acts like a well meaning undertaker. Nancy Pelosi, on the other hand, is always smiling. Even if she may not always get the joke.

Turkeys aren't hypocrites either. Like those sanctimonious politicians who preach family values and then get arrested in public restrooms, or abandon their state and their responsibilities to run off with a mistress in Argentina. These politicians are given a sacred trust by the people and promptly abuse that trust.

Turkeys seem to have a sense of the limited time they have on earth, and seem content to make the most of their wing flapping, cute noisemaking days.

So this Thanksgiving, let's show a little respect for turkeys, whether they bought the farm or are still on the farm. And the next time you see a human being behaving badly, don't call them a turkey. Turkeys deserve better than that.

Scott Blakeman appears regularly on The Strategy Room at foxnews.com. He is performing "A Liberal Dose of Political Humor" November 25 at 7:30 pm at The Wilmette Theater in Illinois.

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Half listening to the Sunday talk show clap trap, I thought I misheard Hillary Clinton when she said she had not yet met Sarah Palin, but wouldn't mind chatting with her over a cup of coffee. I couldn't believe these two pivotal political women weren’t personally acquainted, but then again, Sarah dissed Hil pretty hard for playing the gender card, or as Sarah called it: "whining." I guess it's not whining if you write it instead of say it. 

     I can't say that Hillary's coffee offer came off as completely disingenuous, but it did smack a bit of diplomacy. With Sarah Palin's literary tour de force, "Going Rogue," settling scores and naming names, maybe Hillary was just trying to keep her name out of the sequel, "Going Rogue: Part Deux."

     Sunday also marked a full week since I'd given up coffee, and the mere mention of it made me wistful. I wondered where this coffee klatsch would take place: Alaska, New York, Washington D.C.? What kind of coffee would they have: Dunkin Donuts, Starbucks, Tim Horton's, or the oddly appropriate home brewed cup of Chock Full O’Nuts? How does each woman take her coffee? Straight black, decaf, caf, latte, cappuccino, espresso?  Light and sweet, milk, cream, Half & Half? Real sugar, Equal or Splenda? As you can see, it's been a rough seven days.

     I am also curious if anyone has bothered looking up the definition of the word rogue. According to Dictionary.com, it's a noun meaning "a dishonest, knavish person. A scoundrel." As a verb it means "to cheat." Its synonyms: "bad egg, charlatan, con artist." But no worries, we aren't big on looking up words. It's so much easier to figure them out from the way they sound. And rogue just sounds like uber-maverick doesn't it?

     This reminds of me of when President Obama was asked his opinion about the African-American Harvard Professor who was arrested for breaking into his own home. He said, the Cambridge Police "acted stupidly" and The Beer Summit was born. There probably would have been no controversy if the President had chosen a different adjective: ludicrously, preposterously, obtusely. I imagine if he'd said the police acted "sophomorically," most people would have assumed the cop in question hadn't finished high school.

     It's interesting that when men make plans to colloquy, it's over alcohol, hence the infamous Beer Summit. Hillary Clinton, by contrast, said coffee. So this meeting, should it ever happen, will be a cordial but very sober sit down. And please, Ladies, no whining.

If you could go one-on-one with Sarah Palin, what questions would you ask? Click "leave a comment" below to fill us in!

Plus, don't forget to tune in to 'Hannity' on Wednesday at 9p et when Palin sits down with Sean!